ModernHealthJournal.com

There is no question about - not every man is created equal. And, this is not to pick on men because it's no secret that there are plenty of ladies out there who need to check themselves before, they start criticizing every guy who doesn't live up to their standards. Still, we all must start somewhere when it comes to fixing the important things in life and everyone can agree that having a good man in a woman's life definitely fits into that category. So, whether we are talking about a guy that is already in your life or we're looking at some guys out there that seem to have potential but who you haven't closed the deal with yet, there's no reason to start the to do list right here and right now.

The Inspection

Not every man with the potential to be all that he can be and all that you want him to be is going to be walking around with a sign around his neck saying that he has the right stuff. In fact, it's often the guys who seem to be a walking billboard for perfection that fail when the real tests are applied. And, if there's one thing that ladies know how to do, it is come up with tests for the men in their lives. So, the question here is how do we know if a man has the right stuff even if it's in its rawest form? Well, the secret to knowing that is simply to observe him in his natural environment. Do you see him being kind to those around him and, especially those who he may have some power or control over? A woman has to know if there is some kind of basic flaw in the man's character and nothing says that more seeing the way he treats others and, as we said, those who he could hurt either by ignoring them or by taking actions that are damaging either physically or emotionally.

Once you have determined that the man is not a monster and that he appears to have an awareness of others and is willing to take their needs into consideration it might be time to approach him and find out a little more about what makes him tick. One way of doing that is to strike up a conversation that will get him talking about his likes and dislikes and how he spends his free time. One of the best ways to do this is to start by mentioning something that you might have done and see what kind of response that you get out of him. If he doesn't pretend to stick his finger down his throat when confronted with your story if may be that finds that activity something that he finds an acceptable thing to do.

The key thing in this situation is not to make the guy feel like he's being interrogated by you. Offer up some things about yourself like stories from you past or even a recent weekend and try to get him to reciprocate with some stories of his own. Not only are you likely to find out what this guy likes but you will probably find out if he has a sense of humor, what kind that might be and if he knows how to tell a good story.

Having Character Versus Being One

Getting to understand any man can be a long and complicated process but once you have a handle on who he is when it comes to the way he treats others is a major step. The next step is to figure out how he sees himself. By this we mean getting to see the world through his eyes and how he reacts to what he sees. For instance, does he see the world as a dark place with a lot of dangers that he must protect himself and others that he may care about from. Or, perhaps, does he see life as a joy to be consumed for everything that it's worth. Now, there may be a lot of variations on this theme but the bottom line here is that men can and do have a lot of different viewpoints on what the world and life are and how they should react to them. Take a man who sees the world as a dark place that is filled with creatures and situations which are out to take everything away from him. Men like that often tend to have a rather dark streak and can be quite protective of their thoughts and possessions. The often are rather hard to get to know because they tend to see everyone as a potential enemy and are afraid of divulging information that can be used against them either now or in the future.

On the other hand, there are a lot of guys who think of the world and life as something to be lived to its fullest and, in many cases, with a lot of humor. Men like this tend to always be looking for a laugh and enjoy the things that make that happen. These are the guys who really like comedies in film and television and they often give themselves away very easily by their choices in wardrobe, if you want to call it that, by wearing a lot of T-shirts with things like The Three Stooges on them. Now, a lot of women may think that this kind of guy should immediately be cast aside as he is likely to be a serious candidate for them as he is about being serious about anything at all. But, wait, as it often turns out, many guys with a bit of a goofy streak can turn out to be a great deal of fun to be around but it just might take a little work to get them to see that, even though there are plenty of laughs that should be had in life, being the butt of other people's jokes simply because they have failed to recognize just how important a man's wardrobe can be to his success and his chances for real opportunities in life. So, choosing a man who demonstrates that he has a positive outlook on life but knows when and where to take things seriously may not be easy but any serious woman with a fun streak would be well advised not to overlook some of those men out there that may not seem like the obvious choices.

Being Nice Isn't Everything

Sure, every woman wants a man with a good heart and a positive outlook, but she also wants a man who knows his way around the world and around a woman. And, if it's one thing that most women have come to understand it's the fact that not every man is cut out to be a leader in the world or in the bedroom, assuming that's what she really wants. But, there are numerous studies that show that most men, just like women, tend to mature a great deal once they hit thirties and beyond and that experience is the best teacher. So, even though there may be a lot of natural leaders out there many of them who have a history of showing it at an early age often flounder later in life as they discover that the personality and determination that made them natural leaders in their youth are not enough to weather the storms that will come at them in adult life and with dealing with colleagues who are not the same often wimpy boys that got pushed around in high school. Knowing all of this, it is safe to say that there are millions of younger men who may not seem like world beaters but, given some time and seasoning, can become stronger and wiser when it really matters. And, those men also tend to gain a lot of experience and wisdom that translates not only to the boardroom but also the bedroom.

The Final Product

Yes, women all around the world have been asking themselves how and where they can find a man that is the stuff of their dreams. And, as these women become more mature they come to realize that very few guys alive can live up to the image of Prince Charming but that many of them, if they have the raw elements can become a very real version of all of these ladies' dreams. The question is - do they deserve these guys?

Sure, there's no doubt that every decent woman deserves a guy worthy of their love and admiration. But, it doesn't really seem fair to put the whole burden on men to live up to a woman's dream when she isn't showing herself to be Cinderella. So, it seems like this is probably a good time for all the ladies to take a good look in the mirror and ask themselves if they are doing all the things that they can to become the woman that a worthwhile man deserves. If not, there's no reason to despair, After all, if a woman can look at a man who may not yet be all that he can be and see the potential in him then it seems quite likely that a man in the same position should be able to see the potential in her.

The key thing to keep in mind here is that no matter who you are you could always find ways to improve yourself. And, if we could all find someone who was willing to climb that mountain themselves and help someone else who is willing to make that climb, we just might all find what we are looking for.